As someone who has worked a bit in marketing, I know that it’s not always easy to sell things. You have to come up with just the right spin to convince someone that they *want* what you have to offer.

The results typically range from the reasonable to the manipulative to the misleading, but sometimes you’ll come across a sales pitch that leaves you with no reaction other than to marvel at the sheer audacity of the seller.

This is especially prevalent in the amateur sales shenanigans of person-to-person online marketplaces. Check out these astonishing items, and their accompanying marketing tactics.

10. The autograph of a ghost

Smells like a load of crap.

9. A TIE Fighter

This is quickly spooling out of control.

8. A giant AirPod

I mean, I guess they both pulse?

7. A custom couch

For the lonely who don’t want to admit they’re alone.

6. A phone upgrade

I love that they didn’t even have the wherewithal to Photoshop it. Or just Google a picture of a real iPhone 11.

5. “Toilet paper seeds”

I can only assume this was from the early days of lockdown, when we were truly desperate.

4. A DIY table

IKEA’s got nothin’ on this guy.

3. Limited edition milk

I’m not sure something that turns rancid after a month should be considered a collector’s item.

2. Capless cap

Either a complete idiot or a marketing genius.

1. Slightly damaged goods

Somebody got way too into their first person shooter.

How many of those sales attempts were sincere and how many were jokes? We can never know for sure, but we do know this: buyer beware.

What’s the shadiest deal you’ve seen online?

Tell us about it in the comments.

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