You seen any good tweets around lately? I’ve been lookin’ and lookin’ and for the life of me I just can’t seem to track any down.

I’ve tried everything – the park, under my couch, beneath the fears I keep locked away within my deepest self, and nothin’!

I guess maybe I could try scrolling down. See if there are any tweets below this text. But, yanno, I DOUBT it.

10. Deep fears

I experienced quicksand in real life for the first time recently and let me tell you, it is, at worst, trippy.

9. Silly goose

“We tried to warn ya man! Get out of our pavilion, man!”

8. Uber sneaky

“Oh crap I was supposed to take a picture, here ya go.”

7. Frog day afternoon

He blob. He frog. He nap inside he bog.

6. Let him speak!

The pressure is too much and I just sorta crumble.

5. Checkmate

Just give them some bread and let them be.

4. The big five

That’s an enormous accomplishment, maybe. Depends on the content of the mails.

3. New expectations

The bags within the bag always feels stupid until the moment you need it and you can’t find it.

2. Do the math

Hey, that sounds like a pretty sweet deal.

1. On the flip side

It’s all me, and it’s all a mess.

Oh wow, it turns out the Tweets were here all along! On this very page! And inside all of us! The internet truly is a magical place.

Who are your favorite people to follow on Twitter?

Tell us in the comments.