The Library of Congress used to archive every tweet ever sent. Everything inane, everything hilarious, everything historic, everything Presidential, everything that fit all four of those categories. It’s really pretty mind-boggling to think about.
In fact their minds might have gotten just a little bit too boggled, because they became more selective about what they decided to archive starting in 2017.
From that point on, you might be gettin’ into the great library, and ya might not. The thing is, there are something like 350,000 new Tweets sent out every single minute, and continuing to archive that compounding mass just became too big of a task.
However, I’d like to nominate these particular tweets for preservation. For us. For our future.
14. Trouble in the water
Dolphins are the jocks of the ocean.
just found out dolphins routinely beat the shit out of sharks on sight for pretty much no reason lolol
— Becca O'Neal 🍒 (@becca_oneal) January 30, 2021
13. Money talks
Ok but can you explain shorting to me?
THIS IS NOT A FINANCE ACCOUNT. I DO NOT HAVE ANY TRADING ADVICE.
HEDGES-STOCKS IS MY SURNAME.
— Zoah Hedges-Stocks (@Zoah_HS) January 29, 2021
12. Marching on
Colbert has always been ahead of his time.
It's so cold in New York this weekend, I think I might stay inside since last March.
— Stephen Colbert (@StephenAtHome) January 30, 2021
Life imitates art imitating life.
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) January 29, 2021
10. Meme queen
Ah the good old days.
Me arriving in heaven pic.twitter.com/BiAcwc4QTY
— James (@MrJamesStapes) January 29, 2021
9. Taking stock
almost had to learn how the stock market worked this week pic.twitter.com/n0rLFspkey
— Erin Sullivan (@sullivem) January 29, 2021
8. It’s magic
This seems like what their strategy has been.
We will reopen when everything gets a little worse. Thank you
— Disneyland (@Disneyland2go) January 29, 2021
7. Dog on the run
Is he in the witness protection program?
So many of you play fast & loose w photos of ur dog, it’s refreshing to see someone respect their dog’s right to privacy pic.twitter.com/VCfUKR0dAi
— Brain Bae (@brian_bahe) January 29, 2021
6. Life hack
Work smarter, not harder.
ariana grande writing the light is coming pic.twitter.com/fFOYR9eoRC
— jorge (@aricheatcode) January 29, 2021
5. It’s in the bag
My hubris has been my undoing.
Reading cooking instructions off the bag I just threw out pic.twitter.com/AuVZnnFmeO
— StepMom Marie 🖤 (@mariebabyyyyy_) January 29, 2021
4. Quiet down
You know what you did.
— whisper app (@whispers_finest) January 29, 2021
3. Don’t question it
Our butts have something to say.
When a fart ends in an inflection… like a little question mark ? that is very funny to me
— ellory smith (@ellorysmith) January 30, 2021
2. Spell it out
This is the future that liberals want.
— Ms. Grace Kuhlenschmidt (@GKuhlenschmidt) January 29, 2021
1. All an act
Thank you for coming to my one woman show.
me after my period week pic.twitter.com/0qvQQpuFoe
— 𝔯𝔬 (@romanrochelle) January 29, 2021
Just perfect. They need to be passed down to posterity. Get on it, Congress.
What Twitter account would you like preserved forever?
Tell us in the comments.