Open wide, it’s time for your daily dose of Twitter funny.
You’re a growing person, you need your vitamin T. Four out of five doctors recommend that I stop calling them and asking them about this, but trust me, looking at tweets is definitely the key to unlocking a healthier lifestyle.
Sit back and let these fifteen do your body some good.
14. Keep it goin
Of the mess you left when you went away…
to remind you https://t.co/M6YwRDZ1PB
— Alanis Morissette (@Alanis) October 22, 2020
13. Beyond me
Burgers of all kinds are welcome in my heart. Specifically, my arteries.
A “beyond burger” implies the existence of a “bed burger ” and a “bath burger”
— Eddie D’ohgrou (@didgeridougrou) October 18, 2020
12. Big mistake
Don’t look at me don’t look at me don’t look at me…
Every meeting when you suffer from imposter syndrome pic.twitter.com/J3XdTUUX5k
— Chris 🏳️🌈 (@chrispaget1) October 18, 2020
11. Get ’em George
Inaccurate, my bedroom was nowhere near that nice.
George Lopez just dropped the greatest TikTok of all-time pic.twitter.com/SA9WC0adyB
— B. W. Carlin (@BaileyCarlin) October 24, 2020
10. Hurry up
We’re reaching levels of thirst that shouldn’t even be possible.
Where is the damn vaccine?! https://t.co/N490R5uoc5
— Mik. (@OkSoMik) October 19, 2020
9. Role of a lifetime
It’s perfect, thanks.
emma roberts after booking a role where she has to be blonde and mean pic.twitter.com/6RVmkmNPdr
— hi ☆ (@usedwifi) October 24, 2020
8. Side eye
Poor guy just cannot catch a break.
At a drive-thru, waiting on my order, looking at phone. Guy at window: “you kinda look like Tony Hawk”
me (turning towards him, assuming he is in on the joke): “haha, cool”
Him (looking disappointed): “well, from the side you do. Here’s your food.”
— Tony Hawk (@tonyhawk) October 24, 2020
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How I spoil myself pic.twitter.com/PW8CNHSQVX
— jessica (@Mtz_jess144) October 19, 2020
6. Move it move it
I feel so much less crazy, it’s great.
Me lip syncing at the grocery store under my mask: pic.twitter.com/30jeAVUtNL
— albs ❄️ (@albertoutspoken) October 20, 2020
5. Don’t get testy
Looks like your fear might be justified.
Me: I'm scared of tommorow's test
Also me: pic.twitter.com/t4CnRwrwNr
— 𝒮𝒕𝒆𝒍𝒍𝒂✨ (@melodyofsunset_) October 18, 2020
4. Big brain time
Gotta split it up into three little words and sound it out.
me after i spell wensday right pic.twitter.com/Rl7sQLZVAc
— geni 🧃 (@geniwithluv) October 18, 2020
3. Squid life
He had dreams once too, you know.
The older we get, the more we understand this guy. pic.twitter.com/6K8CyfpmKO
— Macbaaby (@MacBaaby) October 19, 2020
2. Wait for it
Who forgot to take me out of the freezer today?
Don’t talk to me when i wake up, i need an hour to defrost
— Paki blinder➐ (@s41ah) October 19, 2020
1. Hidden subtext
A whole new incarnation of “this is fine.”
When I send "🙂", this is what I mean https://t.co/xg0NhCgHzQ
— AM 🧻 (@Abdulmir19) October 16, 2020
You’re probably already experiencing some of the health benefits of funny tweets. Ask you doctor if more of them are right for you!
Who are your favorite people to follow on Twitter?
Tell us in the comments.