I’ve never been too big into romantic comedies myself.
The fact that I (typical straight dude) am not the target audience probably goes a long way toward explaining this, but even beyond that, there’s just something…troubling about them.
Someone on Reddit seems to agree with me:
So, what’s going on in these flicks that you definitely wouldn’t want to encounter in real life?
Let’s break it down.
1. Why you gotta fight?
Having scream-fighting matches with your partner constantly because you’re both so “passionate” like in the notebook…like, nah bro.
You’re just incompatible.
That sh*t ain’t cute
2. Stay away from me.
Casually stalking who they’re pursuing.
3. Breaking and entering.
Breaking into your crushes house and laying on their bed.
Movies: “aww he misses her that’s sweet.”
Real life: “You going to jail.”
4. Don’t make a scene.
An overdramatic proposal in front of a bunch of strangers.
5. No means no.
Chasing someone who already said no, multiple times.
If someone is already in a relationship trying to break them up.
“Love” at first sight, no, that’s just lust and desire.
6. Have a little professionalism.
Therapists dating or having sex with their patients. “Oh but they have such a deep connection!”
No, that’s a malpractice lawsuit in the making.
7. Lotta hate for The Notebook out there.
In the notebook, Ryan gosling’s character literally builds a house for his ex girlfriend a decade after they split, who is now married to somebody else.
Imagine if that was real life. Imagine your teenage boyfriend out of the blue just built a house and expected you to move in with him.
8. Don’t be a homewrecker.
Pursuing someone who is already in a relationship
9. They take these things seriously.
Breaking through airport security to profess your love.
Have fun getting tased and sent to prison jack*ss.
10. How did you get here?
Turning up on someone’s doorstep when they haven’t given you their address
11. Communication is key.
Never saying goodbye at the end of a phone call and just putting the phone down.
12. It’s not the Middle Ages.
Any kind of combat. Sword fights, fisticuffs, or any other kind of violence on behalf of the person you’re trying to woo.
And even if violence is called for – if you do end up being the person who physically saves a woman from harm?
That is not the time for flirting.
13. This one is – hey wait, a minute…
Trying to get your mum and dad to fall in love at the enchantment under the sea dance but your mother ends up with the hots for you, all while trying to generate 1.21 gigawatts while driving at 88 miles per hour!
14. Guys, take this seriously.
Stealing their baby brother and taking them to the castle at the center of the labyrinth to eventually turn them into a goblin.
15. Ok, we’re done here.
Every male in the entire village always hitting on the one single blue female.
So, maybe romantic comedies just aren’t for me. Or maybe, more and more, they really aren’t for anybody.
What would you add to this list?
Tell us in the comments.